2009 September - ninjajokes.com

Why did the burglar take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway

Why did the cannibal break up with his girlfriend?

She didn’t suit his taste!

Why did the bus stop?

Because it saw the zebra crossing.

Why did the cannibal live on his own?

He was fed up with other people.

Why did the cannibal eat the tightrope walker?

He wanted a balanced meal.

Why did the car judder to a stop when it saw a ghost?

It had a nervous breakdown.

Why did the cat sleep under the car ?

Because she wanted to wake up oily !

Why did the cat put the letter “M” into the fridge ?

Because it turns “ice” into “mice” !

Why did the cat join the Red Cross ?

Because she wanted to be a first-aid kit !

Why did the chicken cross the “net” ?

It wanted to get to the other site !

Why did the chick disappoint his mother ?

He wasn’t what he was cracked up to be !

Why did the chicken cross the road half way ?

He wanted to lay it on the line !

Why did the chicken cross the playground ?

To get to the other slide

Why did the chicken cross the basketball court ?

He heard the referee calling fowls

Why did the chicken cross the road in Missouri?

To show the opossum it could be done.

Why did the chicken get sent off?

For persistent fowl play!

Why did the chicken end up in the soup ?

Because it ran out of cluck !

Why did the computer act crazy?

It had a screw loose.

Why did the composer spend all his time in bed?

He wrote sheet music.

Why did the chicken walk on the telephone wire?

She wanted to lay it on the line!

Why did the cow jump over the moon?

To get to the Milky Way!

Why did the condom cross the road?

Because it was pissed off.

Why did the cowboy get a hot seat?

Because he rode the range.

Why did the cowboy die with his boots on ?

Because he didn’t want to stub his toe when he kicked the bucket !

Why did the cowboy’s car stop?

It had Injun (engine) trouble.

Why did the cowboy ride his horse?

Because the horse was too heavy to carry.

Why did the dinosaur walk on two legs?

To give the ants a chance.

Why did the dentist make a poor date with the manicurist?

Because they fought both tooth and nail!

Why did the dog have a gleam in his eye?

Someone bumped his elbow while he was brushing his teeth.

Why did the dog go to the doctor after a tomato fell on his head?

The tomato was in a can.

Why did the dish and spoon hide their computer?

The cat kept fiddling with i.t.

Why did the dog mistake the dog catcher for a grape?

He was colour-blind.

Why did the dog jump into the sea?

He wanted to chase the catfish!

Why did the dog say he was an actor?

His leg was in a cast.

Why did the dog run in circles?

He was a watchdog and needed winding.

Why did the dog’s owner think his dog was a great mathematician?

When he asked the dog what six minus six was, the dog said nothing.

Why did the dog wear white sneakers ?

Because his boots were at the menders !

Why did the dog sleep so poorly?

By mistake he plugged his electric blanket into the toaster and kept popping out of bed all night!

Why did the dolphin feel crabby?

Because he ate too many crabs!

Why did the duck stick his leg into a computer?

He wanted to have webbed feet.