Eddie's father called up to him, 'Eddie, if you don't stop playing that trumpet I think I'll go crazy!'Eddy replied, 'I think you are already, I stopped playing half an hour ... Read more

Father: You've got 4 D's and a C on your report.Son: "Maybe I concentrated too much on the one subject ... Read more

Father: What did you learn in school today ?Son: That three and three are seven.Father: Three and three are six !Son: I guess I didn't learn anything today then ... Read more

Fred: Where does the new kid come from? Harry: Alaska. Fred: Don't bother - I'll ask her ... Read more

George knocked on the door of his friend's house. When his friend's mother answered he asked, 'can Albert come out to play?''No, said the mother, 'it's too cold.''Well, then,' said George, ' can his football come out to ... Read more

Grandma: You've left all your crusts, Mary. When I was your age I ate every one.Mary: Do you still like crusts, Grandma?Grandma: Yes, I do.Mary: Well, you can have ... Read more

I had a funny dream last night, Mom. Did you? I dreamed I was awake, but when I woke up I found I was ... Read more

Jennifer: Are you coming to my party ?Sandra: No, I ain't.Jennifer: Now, you know what Miss told us. Not ain't. It's I am not coming, he is not coming, she is not coming, they are not coming. Sandra: Blimey, ain't ... Read more

John kept pestering his parents to buy a video, but they said they couldn't afford one. So one day John came home clutching a package containing a brand-new video.'Where in the World did you get the money to pay for ... Read more

Little Johnny came home from school with a note from his teacher saying that Johnny was having trouble telling the difference between boys and girls, and would his mother please sit down and have a talk with Johnny ... Read more