Small Dead and dying jokes for party

Dead and dying jokes and humor. Find the best jokes, short jokes, party jokes, free jokes, Dead and dying jokes, small jokes and more online.

What has four legs, a tail, whiskers and flies?

A dead cat.

What is posthumous work ?

Something written by someone after they are dead !

What is the difference between a musician and a dead body?

One composes and the other decomposes.

What is the last thing you eat before you die?

You bite the dust.

What kind of ghosts haunt operating theatres?

Surgical spirits.

What lies on the ground 100 feet up in the air and smells?

A dead centipede.

What’s a zombie’s favorite pop song?

Dead sails in the sunset.

What’s the difference between a very old, shaggy Yeti and a dead bee?

One’s a seedy beast and the other’s a deceased bee.

When a knight in armour was killed in battle, what sign did they put on his grave ?

Rust in peace !

Where do ghosts go for their holidays?

The Dead Sea.

Why did the cowboy die with his boots on ?

Because he didn’t want to stub his toe when he kicked the bucket !

Why did the monster take a dead man for a drive in his car?

Because he was a car-case.

Why do cemeteries have fences around them?

Because people are dying to get in.

Why do you want to be buried at sea?

Because my wife says she wants to dance on my grave.

Why was George Washington buried at Mount Vernon ?

Because he was dead !

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