Fishing jokes
Fishing jokes and humor. Find the best jokes, short jokes, party jokes, free jokes, Fishing jokes, small jokes and more online.
What fish do road-menders use ?
Pneumatic krill !
What fish goes up the river at 1…
What fish goes up the river at 100mph ?
A motor pike !
What fish make the best sandwich…
What fish make the best sandwich?
A peanut butter and jellyfish
What fish sounds like a telephon…
What fish sounds like a telephone?
Herring, herring…herring, herring…herring, herring.
What is dry on the outside, fill…
What is dry on the outside, filled with water and blows up buildings ?
A fish tank !
What is the difference between a…
What is the difference between a fisherman and a lazy student?
One baits his hook, the other hates his book.
What kind of a fish does your Pa…
What kind of a fish does your Parrot sit on?
A Perch!
What kind of fish will help you …
What kind of fish will help you hear better ?
A herring aid !
What kind of fish is useful in f…
What kind of fish is useful in freezing weather ?
Skate !
What kind of musical instrument …
What kind of musical instrument can you use for fishing?
The cast-a-net.
What sort of net is useless for …
What sort of net is useless for catching fish ?
A football net !
What was the name of Tom Sawyer’…
What was the name of Tom Sawyer’s fish?
Huckleberry Fin!
What was the Tsar of Russia’s fa…
What was the Tsar of Russia’s favorite fish ?
Tsardines !
What will santa bring your fish …
What will santa bring your fish this christmas?
A scale letrix!
What’s a sea serpent’s favourite…
What’s a sea serpent’s favourite meal?
Fish and ships!
What’s the best way to catch a f…
What’s the best way to catch a fish?
Have someone throw it at you.
What’s the difference between an…
What’s the difference between an angler and a dunce?
One baits his hooks while the other hates his books.
When fish play football, who is …
When fish play football, who is the captain ?
The team’s kipper !
Where are most fish found ? Betw…
Where are most fish found ?
Between the head and the tail !
Where do you go to meet the best…
Where do you go to meet the best fish?
It doesn’t matter – any old plaice will do.
Which fish dresses the best? The…
Which fish dresses the best?
The Swordfish – It always looks sharp!
While sports fishing off the Flo…
While sports fishing off the Florida coast, a tourist capsized his boat. He could swim, but his fear of alligators kept him clinging to the overturned craft. Spotting and old beachcomber standing on the shore, the tourist shouted,”Are there any gators around here?
!” “Naw,” the man hollered back, “they ain’t been around for years!” “Feeling safe, the tourist started swimming leisurely toward the shore. About halfway there he asked the guy,”How’d you get rid of the gators?
” “We didn’t do nothin’,” the beachcomber said. “The sharks got ‘em.”
Who sleeps at the bottom of the …
Who sleeps at the bottom of the sea ?
Jack the kipper !
Why are fish cleverer than human…
Why are fish cleverer than humans?
Ever seen a fish spend a fortune trying to hook a human?
Why are fish boots the warmest o…
Why are fish boots the warmest ones to wear ?
Because they have electric ‘eels !
Why are fish so gullible?They fa…
Why are fish so gullible?
They fall for things hook, line and sinker!
Why are fish no good at tennis?T…
Why are fish no good at tennis?
They don’t like to get too close to the net!
Why are gold fish orange ? The w…
Why are gold fish orange ?
The water makes them rusty !
Why are sardines the stupidest f…
Why are sardines the stupidest fish in the sea ?
Because they climb into tins, close the lid and leave teh key outside !
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