What kind of watch is best for p…
What kind of watch is best for people who don’t like time on their hands?
A pocket watch.
What time is it when a clock str…
What time is it when a clock strikes thirteen?
Time to get it fixed.
What time is it when an elephant…
What time is it when an elephant sits on your car?
Time to get a new car.
What time is it when five dogs a…
What time is it when five dogs are chasing a cat down the street?
Five after one.
What time is it when your watchd…
What time is it when your watchdog lets a robber take the family silver?
Time to get a new watchdog.
When is the best time to go shop…
When is the best time to go shopping?
When the stores are open.
While proudly showing off his ne…
While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends, a college student led the way into the den.”What is the big brass gong and hammer for?
” one of his friends asked.”That is the talking clock,” the man replied.”How’s it work?
” the friend asked.”Watch,” the student said then proceeded to give the gong an ear shattering pound with the hammer.Suddenly someone screamed from the other side of the wall, “KNOCK IT OFF, YOU JERK! It’s two AM!”
Why couldn’t the clock be kept i…
Why couldn’t the clock be kept in jail?
Because time was always running out.
Why did the girl sit on her watc…
Why did the girl sit on her watch?
She wanted to be on time.
Why did the kid put his clock in…
Why did the kid put his clock in the oven.He wanted to have a hot time.
Why did the man put a clock unde…
Why did the man put a clock under his desk?
He wanted to work overtime.
Why did your sister shoot the al…
Why did your sister shoot the alarm clock ?
Because she felt like killing time.
Why is the time in the USA behin…
Why is the time in the USA behind that of England ?
Because England was discovered before the USA !
Why shouldn’t you tell secrets w…
Why shouldn’t you tell secrets when a clock is around?
Because time will tell.



