2011 October
2011 October and humor. Find the best jokes, short jokes, party jokes, free jokes, 2011 October, small jokes and more online.
What does a man who loves his car do on February 14?
He gives it a valenshine!
What does a monster do when he l…
What does a monster do when he loses his head?
He calls a head hunter.
What does a monster mom say to h…
What does a monster mom say to her kids at dinnertime?
Don’t talk with someone in your mouth.
What does a pig use to write his…
What does a pig use to write his term papers with?
Pen and Oink!
What does a polite monster say w…
What does a polite monster say when he meets you for the first time?
Pleased to eat you!
What does a queen bee do when sh…
What does a queen bee do when she burps ?
Issues a royal pardon !
What does a spider do when he ge…
What does a spider do when he gets angry ?
He goes up the wall !
What does a twelve-pound mouse s…
What does a twelve-pound mouse say to a cat ?
‘Here Kitty, kitty, kitty’ !
What does a vampire stand on aft…
What does a vampire stand on after taking a shower?
A bat mat.
What does a witch do if her broo…
What does a witch do if her broom is stolen ?
She calls the flying squad !
What does a witch get if she’s a…
What does a witch get if she’s a poor traveler?
Broom sick.
What does an aardvark get when h…
What does an aardvark get when he overeats?
Ant-digestion!
What does an aardvark keep in hi…
What does an aardvark keep in his aquarium?
An aard-shark!
What does an aardvark take for a…
What does an aardvark take for ant-digestion?
Anta-Seltzer!
What does an aardvark use when h…
What does an aardvark use when he has a cold?
An ant-ihistamine!
What does an accountant say when…
What does an accountant say when you ask him the time?
It’s 9.18 am and 12 seconds; no wait – 13 seconds, no wait – 14 seconds, no wait……
What does an accountant use for …
What does an accountant use for birth control?
His personality.
What does an astronaut do when h…
What does an astronaut do when he gets angry?
He blasts off:
What does an envelope say when y…
What does an envelope say when you lick it?
Nothing. It just shuts up.
What does an octopus take on a c…
What does an octopus take on a camping trip?
Tentacles!
What does an octopus wear on a c…
What does an octopus wear on a cold day?
A coat of arms!
What does Dracula say to his vic…
What does Dracula say to his victims?
It’s been nice gnawing you.
What does Dracula say when you t…
What does Dracula say when you tell him a new fact?
Well, fangcy that!
What does Dracula write on his C…
What does Dracula write on his Christmas cards ?
Best vicious of the season
What does ever horse and rider d…
What does ever horse and rider do at the same time?
Grow old!
What does Father Christmas call …
What does Father Christmas call his money ?
Iced lolly ?
What does Father Christmas call …
What does Father Christmas call that reindeer with no eyes?
No-eyed-deer!
What does Father Christmas suffe…
What does Father Christmas suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney ?
Santa Claustrophobia !
What does FCPA stand for?Finally…
What does FCPA stand for?
Finally Caught Pinching the Assets
What does Frankenstein’s monster…
What does Frankenstein’s monster call a screwdriver?
Daddy.
What does it mean if you find a …
What does it mean if you find a horse shoe?
Some poor horse is walking around in his socks.
What does it mean to come home t…
What does it mean to come home to a man who’ll give you some love and tenderness?
You’re in the wrong house.
What does it mean when an accoun…
What does it mean when an accountant is drooling out of both sides of his mouth?
His desk is level
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