Funny Jokes A-B
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What happens when you drop a hand gren-egg ?
It eggs-plodes !
What has 200 legs, 50 noses, and…
What has 200 legs, 50 noses, and is very loud?
A herd of stampeding aardvarks!
What has six legs, two arms, fou…
What has six legs, two arms, four eyes and a tail?
A man holding an aardvark.
What has wings, a long tail, and…
What has wings, a long tail, and wears a bow?
A birthday pheasant!
What have I got in my hands? A d…
What have I got in my hands?
A double decker bus! You looked!
What is a baby: A soft pink thin…
What is a baby: A soft pink thing that makes a lot of noise at one end and has no sense of responsibility at the other.
What is a duck’s favorite TV sho…
What is a duck’s favorite TV show ?
The feather forecast !
What is a ghost-proof bicycle? O…
What is a ghost-proof bicycle?
One with no spooks in it.
What is a hamburger’s favourite …
What is a hamburger’s favourite story?
Hansel and Gristle!
What is an elf’s favourite kind …
What is an elf’s favourite kind of birthday cake?
Shortcake!
What is every blonde’s ambition …
What is every blonde’s ambition in life?
To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.
What is green and pecks on trees…
What is green and pecks on trees ?
Woody Wood Pickle !
What is ideal Flight Deck comple…
What is ideal Flight Deck complement for a modern airliner?
A Captain, a Co-pilot and a dog. The dog is there to bite the captain if he tries to touch the controls, and the co-pilot is there to feed the dog.
What is long and yellow and alwa…
What is long and yellow and always points north?
A magnetic banana.
What is red and goes putt, putt,…
What is red and goes putt, putt, putt?
An outboard apple.
What is smaller than an ant’s di…
What is smaller than an ant’s dinner ?
An ant’s mouth !
What is the definition of Robin …
What is the definition of Robin ?
A bird who steals !
What is the definition of a goos…
What is the definition of a goose ?
An animal that grows down as it grows up !
What is the difference between a…
What is the difference between a banana and a bell?
You can only peel (peal) the banana once.
What is the difference between a…
What is the difference between a blind man and a sailor in prison?
One can’t see to go, the other can’t go to sea.
What is the difference between a…
What is the difference between a bus driver and a cold?
One knows the stops, the other stops the nose.
What is the difference between a…
What is the difference between a fly and a bird ?
A bird can fly but a fly can’t bird !
What is the difference between a…
What is the difference between an aardvark and a coyote?
One has a long smeller, the other, a loud yeller!
What is the easiest way to make …
What is the easiest way to make a banana split?
Cut it in half.
What is the hamburgers’ most fam…
What is the hamburgers’ most familiar song?
‘Home on the Range’!
What is the hamburgers’ motto?If…
What is the hamburgers’ motto?
If at first you don’t succeed, fry, fry again!
What is the left side of an appl…
What is the left side of an apple?
The part that you don’t eat.
What is the softest bed for a ba…
What is the softest bed for a baby to sleep on?
Cot-on-wool.
What is yellow and goes click-cl…
What is yellow and goes click-click?
A ball-point banana.Witch: Will I lose my looks as I get older?
Wizard: With luck, yes. Witch:
What is yellow on the inside and…
What is yellow on the inside and green on the outside ?
A banana dressed up as a cucumber !
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