Small Car and train jokes for party

Which snakes are found on cars?

Windscreen vipers.

While driving along the back roads of a small town, two truckers came to an overpass with a sign that read CLEARANCE 11′3.”They got out and measured their rig, which was 12′4.”"What do you think?

” one asked the other.The driver looked around carefully, then shifted into first. “Not a cop in sight. Let’s take a chance!”

Who drives away all of his customers?

A taxicab driver.

Who drives away all his customers ?

A taxi driver.

Why did the car judder to a stop when it saw a ghost?

It had a nervous breakdown.

Why did the man put his car in the oven?

Because he wanted a hot rod.

Why did the stupid racing car driver make ten pit stops during the Grand Prix?

He was asking for directions.

Why did your sister refuse the gift of a Japanese car ?

Because she’d never be able to learn the language

Why do you have to wait so long for a ghost train to come along?

They only run a skeleton service.

Why is an old car like a baby playing?

Because it goes with a rattle.

Why is it not safe to doze on trains?

Because they run over sleepers.

Why was the school principal not pleased when he bumped into an old friend ?

They were both driving their cars at the time !

WIFE: “There’s trouble with the car. It has water in the carburettor.”HUSBAND: “Water in the carburettor?

That’s ridiculous.”WIFE: “I tell you the car has water in the carburettor.”HUSBAND: “You don’t even know what a carburettor is. I’ll check it out.Where’s the car?

“WIFE: “In the pool.”

You know all that talk about backseat driving?

Well, I’ve been driving all my life and can safely say that I’ve never heard a word from the back seat. What kind of car do you drive?

A hearse!