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The Crist family worked at a zoo. Each year they predicted the general luck and overall mood of the year by watching the the gnu. If the gnu's ears were forward, that meant a successful, joyous year was almost certain ... Read more
The cross eyed judge looked at the three defendants in the dock and said to the first one, "So how do you plead?""Not guilty" said the second defendant."I wasn't talking to you" the judge replied."I never said a word" ... Read more
The cyclist, passing a pedestrian crossing, runs into a man, and they both fall down. -"Geez, are you lucky." The cyclist says. -"What do you mean by lucky ?" The pedestrian angrily asks. "I got hurt really bad." -"Ah, ... Read more
The defendant stood up in the dock and said to the judge, "I dont recognize this court!""Why?" asked the Judge."Because you've had it decorated since the last time I was ... Read more
The desk sergeant answered the phone, and at once a woman began screaming. "You've got to help me! There's a giant gray thing in my yard, and it's pulling apples off the tree with its tail!" "What's he doing with the ... Read more
The desk sergeant answered the phone, and at once a woman began screaming. "You've got to help me! There's a giant gray thing in my yard, and it's pulling apples off the tree with its tail!" "What's he doing with the ... Read more
The difference between men and womenA man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. A woman is driving down the same road. As they pass each other, the woman leans out the window and yells, "PIG!"The man immediately ... Read more
The divorce court was attentive as the wealthy Yuppette complained tothe Judge that her husband had left her bed and board.When she had finished, the husband's lawyer rose to his feet andcoolly replied, "Your Honor, I ... Read more
The doctor comes to see his heart transplant patient."This is good news. It is very unusual, but we have two donors to choose from for your new heart."The patient is pleased. He asks, "What were their jobs?""One was a ... Read more
The Doctor was puzzled "I'm very sorry but I can't diagnose your trouble, Mahoney. I think it must be drink. ""Don't worry about it Dr. Kelley, I'll come back when you're ... Read more
