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Fred wrote in her homework book: Margarine is butter made from imitation ... Read more
Fred! What did I say I'd do if I found you with your fingers in the butter again? That's funny, Mom. I can't remember ... Read more
Fred's class was taken to the Natural History Museum in New York. "Did you enjoy yourself?" asked her mother when she got home. "Oh, yes," replied Fred. "But it was funny going to a dead ... Read more
Fred's mother was on the telephone to the boy's dentist. "I don't understand it," she complained, "I thought his treatment would only cost me $20, but you've charged me $80." "It is usually $20, ma'am," agreed the ... Read more
Fred's new girlfriend uses such greasy lipstick that he has to sprinkle his face with sand to get a better ... Read more
Fred: "Why are you so upset?" Harry: "My wife introduced me to her psychiatrist this morning." Fred: "So what?" Harry: "So she said to him, 'Doctor, this is my husband. You know, one of the men I've been telling you ... Read more
Fred: Betty has lovely long red hair all down her back. Harry: Pity it's not on her ... Read more
FRED: Did I ever tell you about the time I came face to face with a very fierce gorilla?BERT: No, what happened?FRED: Well, I stood there, without a gun . . . The gorilla looked at me and snarled and roared and beat his ... Read more
Fred: Did you hear about the Irish window cleaner who put a sign at the top of his ladder? Harry: What did the sign say? Fred: ... Read more
Fred: Do you like my new hairstyle?Harry: In as much as it covers most of your face, ... Read more
