Teacher: I said to draw a cow eating some grass but you've only drawn the cow?Pupil: Yes, the cow ate all the ... Read more

Teacher: I hope I didn't see you looking at Fred's test paper.Pupil: I hope you didn't see me ... Read more

Teacher: How much is half of 8Pupil: Up and down or across ?Teacher: What do you mean ?Pupil: Well,up and down makes a 3 or across the middle leaves a ... Read more

Teacher: If you have five haystacks in one corner, five in another and two in another, how many would you have ?Pupil: One big haystack ... Read more

Teacher: If I lay one egg here and another there, how many eggs will there be?Fred: None!Fred (surprised): Why not?Fred: Because you can't lay ... Read more

Teacher: If I gave you three rabbits today and five rabbits tomorrow, how many rabbits would you have?Jackie: Nine.Teacher: That's not right, you'd have eight.Jackie: No, Teacher, I'd have nine. I already have one ... Read more

Teacher: If 1+1=2 and 2+2=4, what is 4+4?Pupil: That's not fair!You answer the easy ones and leave us with the hard ... Read more

Teacher: I'll call you Fred Smith then.Pupil: My dad won't like that.Teacher: Why is that?Pupil: He doesn't like people taking the Mickey out of my ... Read more

Teacher: I'd like to go through one whole day without having to tell you off.Pupil: You have my permission ... Read more

Teacher: I wished you would pay a little attentionPupil: I'm paying as little as I can ... Read more