Why do so few men end up in Heaven?
They never stop to ask directions.
Why do so few men end up in Heaven?
They never stop to ask directions.
Why do some accountants decide to become actuaries?
They find bookkeeping too exciting.
Why do teachers use a bamboo cane?
Because when the cane goes ‘bam’ the child goes boo!
Why do the elephants have short tails ?
Because they can’t remember long stories !
Why do the Gorillas like Jimmy Carter?
They don’t really know – but they’re NUTS about him!
Why do the hamburgers beat the hot dogs at every sport they play?
Because hot dogs are the wurst!
Why do they put a suicide watch on death row prisoners?
Why would you care if a man you’re planning to kill anyway, kills himself?
Does it spoil the fun?
I also think about the death row prisoner in Texas who, on the day before his execution, managed to take a drug overdose. They rushed him to a hospital, saved his life, then brought him back to prison and killed him.Apparently, just to anger him.
Why do tomcats fight ?
Because they like raising a stink !
Why do tornadoes move so erratically?
-They are dizzy
Why do University of Arkansas graduates tape their diplomas to the windshields of their cars?
So they can park in handicapped spaces.