Patient: I'm in a hospital! Why am I in here?Doctor: You've had an accident involving a bus.Patient: What happened?Doctor: Well, I've got some good news and some bad news. Which would you like to hear first?Patient: ... Read more

Patient: I always see spots before my eyes.Doctor: Didn't the new glasses help?Patient: Sure, now I see the spots much ... Read more

Patient: Doctor, you must help me. I'm under such a lot of stress, I keep losing my temper with people.Doctor: Tell me about your problem.Patient: I just did, didn't I, you stupid ... Read more

Patient: Doctor, what should I do if my temperature goes up five more points?Doctor: ... Read more

Patient: Doctor, if I give up wine, women, and song, will I live longer?Doctor: Not really. It will just seem ... Read more

Patient: Doctor, I think I swallowed a pillow.Doctor: How do you feel?Patient: A little down in the ... Read more