Kowalski and Janzek left Hamtramack and went out in the woods looking for Christmas trees. They looked all day without any luck. Near nightfall Kowalski finally said, “Janzek, I’m takin’ the next tree we come to, whether it has lights on it or not!”
Lady:(standing in the middle of a busy street) Officer, can you tell me how to get to the Hospital?
Officer: Just stand where you are!!!
Kung Fu for Beginnersby Flora Mugga
Lara Rabbit: Do you think that’s Sophie’s natural color?
Zara Rabbit: Only her hare dresser knows for sure.
Larry’s barn burned down, and Susan, his wife, called the insurancecompany …Susan: We had that barn insured for fifty thousand and I want my money.Agent: Whoa there just a minute, Susan; it doesn’t work quite like that. We will ascertain the value of the old barn and provide you with a new one of comparable worth.Susan, after a pause: I’d like to cancel the policy on my husband.
Last night I dreamt I was dancing with the most beautiful girl in the worldWhat was I wearing ?
Knowing that the minister was very fond of cherry brandy, one of the church elders offered to present him with a bottle on one consideration – that the pastor acknowledge receipt of the gift in the church paper. “Gladly,” responded the good man. When the church magazine came out a few days later, the elder turned at once to the “appreciation” column. There he read: “The minister extends his thanks to Elder Brown for his gift of fruit and for the spirit in which it was given.”
Last night I dreamt I ate a giant marshmallow. When I woke up my pillow was gone !
Knock knockWho’s there?
Banana.Banana who?
Knock knockWho’s there?
Banana.Banana who?
Knock knock Who’s there?
Orange.Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn’t say banana ?
Knock KnockWho’s there ?
Curry !Curry who ?
Curry me back home will you !