Monster: Stick ’em down. Ghost: Don’t you mean, stick ’em up. Monster: No wonder I’m not making much money in this business.
Author Archives: lennart
Monster: I’ve got to walk 25 mil…
Monster: I’ve got to walk 25 miles home.’Ghost: Why don’t you take a train?
Monster: I did once, but my mother made me give it back.
Monster: I’ve got to walk 25 mil…
Monster: I’ve got to walk 25 miles home. Ghost: Why don’t you take a train. Monster: I did once, but my mother made me give it back.
Monster-making as a Hobby by Fra…
Monster-making as a Hobby by Frank N. Stine
Monster: Doctor, doctor, I’m a b…
Monster: Doctor, doctor, I’m a blood-sucking monster and I keep needing to eat doctors. Doctor: Oh what a shame. I’m a dentist.
Monster: I’m so ugly. Ghost: It’…
Monster: I’m so ugly. Ghost: It’s not that bad! Monster: It is! When my grandfather was born they passed out cigars. When my father was born they just passed out cigarettes. When I was born they simply passed out.
Mommy monster: Don’t eat that ur…
Mommy monster: Don’t eat that uranium. Little monster: Why not?
Mommy monster: You’ll get atomic-ache.
Monahan stumbled into a saloon, …
Monahan stumbled into a saloon, half crocked. “Say,” he said to the bartender, “how tall is a penguin?
” “About two and a half feet.” “Thank God!” cried Monahan. “I thought I ran over a nun!”
MONSTER MOTHER: How many times h…
MONSTER MOTHER: How many times have I told you not to eat with your fingers?
Use the spade like everyone else.
Moses, Jesus and an old man are …
Moses, Jesus and an old man are golfing. Moses steps up tothe tee and hits the ball. It goes sailing over the fairway and landsin the water trap. Moses parts the water and chips the ball onto thegreen.Jesus steps up to the tee and hits the ball. It goes sailing over thefairway and lands in the water trap.Jesus just walks on the water and chips the ball onto the green. Theold man steps up to the tee and hits the ball. It goes sailing overthe fairway and heads for the water trap. But, just before it fallsinto the water, a fish jumps up and grabs the ball in its mouth. As thefish is falling back down into the water, an eagle swoops down and grabs the fish in its claws. The eagle flies over the green where alightning bolt shoots from the sky and barely misses it. Startled, theeagle drops the fish. When the fish hits the ground, the ball pops outof its mouth and rolls into the hole for a hole-in -one.Jesus then turns to the old man and says, “Dad, if you don’t stopfooling around, we won’t bring you next time.”