They have arrived – Hia Dei Kum
They have arrived – Hia Dei Kum…
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Author Archives: lennart
These two Scottish characters ar…
These two Scottish characters are chatting. One of them then pulls out an expensive looking pocket watch from his pocket to check the time. “That’s a fine watch you got there!” says the other. “Yeah it is, isn’t it?
I got it from my grandfather,” says the guy with the watch. “Really?
” “Yeah, he sold it to me on his death bed.”
These two old men are in a nursi…
These two old men are in a nursing home. They’re talking and realize that it’s been years since they have had sex. So they sneak out and go to the closest whorehouse. Once inside they go to the Pimp and ask for the two best girls. The Pimp thought “I’m not going to waste my two best girls on these guys I’ll just give them inflatable women. They are old and they won’t know the difference.” Once the old men finish they leave. On their way back they start talking. The first guy said, ” I think mine was dead she didn’t move or anything.” The second guy said I think mine was a witch because when I nibbled on her neck she farted and flew out the window.”
These two newfies are building a…
These two newfies are building a house. One of them is putting on the siding. He picks up a nail, hammers it in. Picks up another nail, throws it away. Picks up a nail, hammers it in. Picks up another, throws it away. This goes on for a while, and finally his friend comes over and asks him why he is throwing half of the nails away. He replies, “Those ones were pointed on the wrong end.” The buddy gets exasperated and says “You idiot, those nails are for the other side of the house!”
These two friends are about to g…
These two friends are about to go to a club. One of them has a wooden eye. He said ”If someone says something about my eye, i’m gonna snap.” They get there, and he asks a girl to dance. She says, ”Would I?
”
They’re perfectly matched. He’s …
They’re perfectly matched. He’s blinded by love and her looks are out of sight !
They’re not going to grow banana…
They’re not going to grow bananas any longer. Really?
Why not?
Because they’re long enough already.
They were married, but since the…
They were married, but since the argument they had a few days earlier, they hadn’t been talking to each other.Instead, they were giving each other written notes.One evening he gave her a paper where it said:”Wake me up tomorrow morning at 6 am.”The next morning he woke up and saw that it was 9 o’clock.Naturally he got very angry, but as he turned around he found a note on his pillow saying:”Wake up, it’s 6 o’clock!”
They say that the new super comp…
They say that the new super computer knows everything. A skeptical man came and asked the computer, “Where is my father?
“The computer bleeped for a short while, and then came back with “Your father is fishing in Michigan.”The skeptical man said triumphantly, “You see?
I knew this was nonsense. My father has been dead for twenty years.””No”, replied the super computer immediately. “Your mother’s husband has been dead for twenty years. Your father just landed a three pound trout.”
They say that it’s tough to lear…
They say that it’s tough to learn Bosnian because it has seven verb tenses: six past, one present, and no future.