Q: How many ‘Real Women’ does it take to change a light bulb?

A: None: A ‘Real Woman’ would have plenty of Real Men around to do it.

Q: What do you call a woman who marries an old, ugly and poor man?

A: Stupid!

Q: Which is easier for a man to leave: the women or the Wine?

A: It depends on the age.

Q: Why is a modem better than a woman?

A: A modem doesn’t mind if you talk to other modems. A modem doesn’t complain if you sit and play at the computer all night. A modem will sit patiently and wait by the phone. A modem comes with an instruction manual.

QUESTION: What’s the best way to get a youthful figure?

ANSWER: Ask a woman her age.

QUESTION: What is the difference between a “Battery” and a woman?

ANSWER: A battery has a positive side.

Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman’s sex drive by up to 90%. – It’s called wedding cake.

Shortly after the birth of their second child, her husband offered to take her shopping for a new dress. He endured more than two hours of listening to her complaints about which figure flaw each dress accentuated. As she emerged from the dressing room, having tried on the last selection, she asked for her husband’s opinion. By this time, he had learned just the right things to say. “It’s perfect!” he exclaimed. “It makes your waist look smaller, your legs look longer and slenderizes your hips.” Just then, a voice from the dressing room piped up. “If there’s a dress here that will do all that- I’ll take ten!”

Should I have a baby after 35?

No, 35 children is enough.

Smart man + Smart Woman = RomanceSmart Man + Dumb Woman = PregnancyDumb Man + Smart Woman = AffairDumb Man + Dumb Woman = Marriage