Harry approached a prostitute and asked, “How much for a blow job ?
“.”Hundred Bucks”.”OK”, he said and began to jerk off.”What the hell are you doing that for?
“”For hundred bucks you don’t think I’m going to give you the easyone, do you ?
“
Hair Disordersby Dan Druff
Guidry called in Plotke, the painter, for an estimate to paint his house. “How much you gonna charge me?
” asked Guidry. “Twenty dollars an hour,” replied Plotke. “Good Lord!” exclaimed the home owner. “I wouldn’t pay Michelangelo that price!” “I tell you one thing, mister,” said the painter. “If that guy you mentioned is doin’ the job for less, he ain’t no member of our union!”
Great news, teacher says we have a test today come rain or shine.So what’s so great about that?
It’s snowing outside!
Grandpa: You youngsters are soft and lazy today. When I was your age I got up at six o’clock every morning and walked five or six miles before breakfast. I used to think nothing of it. Fred: I don’t blame you, Grandpa. I wouldn’t think,much of it myself.
Grow Your Own Vegetables by Rosa Carrotts
Harry was madly in love with Betty, but couldn’t pluck up enough courage to pop the question face to face. Finally he decided to ask her on the telephone. ‘Darling!’ he blurted out, ‘will you marry me?
”Of course, I will, you silly boy,’ she replied, ‘who is it speaking?
‘
Guest: Why did you offer me a piece of candy?
Hotel Clerk: You said you wanted the best suite in the hotel.
Had a door-to-door salesman call one time selling of all things — burial plots. I told him that we already had our plots in another cemetery.He seemed uncertain as to what to say next, but he recovered to say politely, “I hope you’ll be very happy there.” […]
Hatton: I ain’t as dumb as I look! Folsom: You couldn’t be!