You’re spending a lot of time at that computer screen. Have you had your eyes checked?
No, they’ve always been blue!
You’re spending a lot of time at that computer screen. Have you had your eyes checked?
No, they’ve always been blue!
You’re trapped in a room with a tiger, a rattlesnake and a lawyer. You have a gun with two bullets. What should you do?
You shoot the lawyer. Twice.
You’ve failed history again !Well you always told me to let bygones be bygones !
Young Actor: Dad, guess what?
I’ve just got my first part in a play. I play the part of a man who’s been married for 30 years. Father: Well, keep at it, son. Maybe one day you’ll get a speaking part.
Young Bobby was being fitted for glasses, and his father, standing beside him, said, “Now, remember, son. Don’t wear them when you’re not looking at anything.”
Young Bradley arrived at his date’s house wearing a shirt that had water dripping from it. “What’re you doin’?
” asked his girlfriend. “How come your shirt is soakin’ wet?
” “Well,” said Bradley, “it said on the label: WASH AND WEAR.”
Young Charlie to dentist’s sexy chariside assistant “Aha ! Are you the lady orthodontist ?
“.The lady replied “No, but I’ll straighten anyone’s teeth “
young couple were on their honeymoon. The husband was sitting in the bathroom on the edge of the bathtub saying to himself, “Now how can I tell my wife that I’ve got really smelly feet and that my socks absolutely stink?
I’ve managed to keep it from her while we were dating, but she’s bound to find out sooner or later that my feet stink. Now how do I tell her?
“Meanwhile, the wife was sitting in the bed saying to herself, “Now how do I tell my husband that I’ve got really bad breath?
I’ve been very lucky to keep it from him while we were courting, but as soon as he’s lived with me for a week, he’s bound to find out. Now how do I tell him gently?
“The husband finally plucks up enough courage to tell his wife and so he walks into the bedroom. He walks over to the bed, climbs over to his wife, puts his arm around her neck, moves his face very close to hers and says, “Darling, I’ve a c onfession to make.”And she says, “So have I, love.”To which he replies, “Don’t tell me, you’ve eaten my socks.”
Young Jimmy was having a snack after school with his Gran. ‘ Would you like another cookie ?
‘ she asked.’Yes, please,’ replied Jimmy.’What good manners you have,’ said his Gran. ‘ I do like to hear young people say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’.”I’ll say them both if I can have a big piece of that cake,’ replied Jimmy !
Young Judy, the editor of a trivia publication, was having trouble with her computer. So she called Prem, the computer guy, over to her desk. Prem clicked a couple buttons and solved the problem.As he was walking away, Judy called after him, “So, what was wrong?
“And he replied, “It was an ID ten T error.”A puzzled expression ran riot over Judy’s face. “An ID ten T error?
What’s that … in case I need to fix it again?
?
“He gave her a grin… ;-)”Haven’t you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?
“”No,” replied Judy.”Write it down,” he said, “and I think you’ll figure it out.”(She wrote…)I D 1 0 T