Ted said to his friend, ‘can you lend me $10?

”But I only have $8,’ his friend replied.That’s OK, you can always owe me the other $2!

The best way of saving money is to forget who you borrowed it from.

Three animals were having a drink in a cafe, when the owner asked for the money. “I’m not paying,” said the duck. “I’ve only got one bill and I’m not breaking it.””I’ve spent my last buck,” said the deer. “Then the duck’ll have to pay,” said the skunk. “Getting here cost me my last scent.”

Three boys were walking along the beach one day when they see a cave. The first boy goes in and is looking at a banknote on a big rock when a ghostly voice calls out ” I am the ghost of Auntie Abel and this five dollars stays on the table!” The second boy goes in and is reaching for the money when the same thing happens again.The third boy goes in ,sees the five dollars and cries out,”I am the ghost of David Crockett and this five dollars goes in my pocket!”

Visitor: You’re very quiet, Jennifer.Jennifer: Well, my mum gave me a dollar not to say anything about your red nose.

What did the man do when he got a big gas bill?

He exploded.

What did the pay phone say when the quarter got stuck inside it?

Money’s tight these days!

What do you get if you cross a sorceress with a millionaire?

A very witch person.

What dog has money?

A bloodhound, because he is always picking up scents (cents).

What happened when Dumbo went to a mindrreader?

They gave him his money back.